From the rain into the drip?
from 'the resolute truth', U.G. Krishnamurti
[ ] For some reason or another you want to be at peace with yourself. Why can't you be at peace with yourself? That's the very first question that I ask you. Why does it always have to be tomorrow or the day after tomorrow? The same is true for your neighbor and for his neighbor; that's the world, do you understand? Every individual is seeking certainty for himself and therefore there can be no certainty in this world. It is not that I am pessimistic or cynical, but that is the reality of the world. What you have tried up to now has done you no good at all!
That's my point of view, so why do you keep busy and hoping that in some way or another, maybe with someone's help or some miracle happening it might become possible for you to be at peace with yourself? That's my question. You try different things, there are so many systems and techniques offered by so many people, isn't that so? They might very well all be professional do-gooders and want the best for you, but nothing has actually helped you.
What's going on? WHY DON'T YOU PLACE A BIG QUESTIONMARK HERE? Maybe there is something wrong with them? Because you can't always just put the blame on yourself, punish yourself and remain feeling paltry. Maybe it is the entire system, including all the teachers that are responsible for it that is at fault! At least keep the possibility open that they may have grabbed the wrong of the stick. I am telling you: they are wrong, they are not good, because their techniques don't work. Do you actually realize that?
You are not honest with yourself. You can be dishonest in this world, that will probably deliver some small advantages, but you can't be dishonest with yourself.
What the gurus all tell you does not work. But still, you hope that you will get it together next time some way or another. In the meantime you are just the opposite: 'Tomorrow you will be a friendly man full of love and compassion...' When? TOMORROW!
So, it is exactly what you are hoping and trying for that is responsible for its opposite, today's misery. Do you understand that? It is just an unhappy person who wants to become happy; a happy person does not have the wish to become happy. So the question of being unhappy does not arise as long as you don't search for happiness.
What I have tried to make clear all these years that I have been speaking about it is that our nervous system can not bear any sensation longer than the natural duration of the sensation. Whether they are pleasant or painful sensations you try to extend the duration of certain sensations by thinking about them. But you can never succeed in that. That way you create a problem for this body! Therefore I keep on hammering on the fact that all our attempts to solve our problems at the level of psychological or religious thinking is the very cause of the problem. In fact they are physiological problems.
Everything, all emotions such as anger, jealousy, hate and any more you might have are neurological problems and your attempts to solve them on a psychological or ethical level will not succeed. You want to extend the duration of a pleasurable sensation, but that only results in pain! It is not that pain follows pleasure, but what you call pleasure (and pain) is actually the pain. Further, it doesn't matter what you want to call it pain, or pleasure, or enjoyment- this is what actually happens; you stay in pain and nothing else!
And this pain, where is it? It does not exist at one or another etheric level it is here, it is part of the body. Therefore the body has to take the consequences and generally you can not solve the problems. The body has to work them out, and the body can do that in a very intelligent and successful way if you just give it a chance. Your desire to solve your problems at some other level will not be honored. It just remains a hope and nothing else. You can't let go of that as far as that is concerned you are really doomed, don't you know that? After all, there is nothing that you can do. But you can't accept that, because the instrument that you use for that is the thinking, and the thinking can't accept that because it has always gotten results for you.
You are what you are because of all the things that thinking has produced for you, and that have cost you much time and effort. Therefore, you also assume that every result achieved by means of thinking necessarily requires time. And it is this principle that shifts the whole business away from you and says: 'this situation is hopeless, we need time', because time has helped to reach results in all the previous situations.
You can not do anything else except interpret what I say. That is unavoidable because that is all you can do by means of thinking. And, you have no other instrument. It is that same instrument that discovered the 'phenomenon' of intuition, and 'understanding intuitively' and whatsoever other lofty things that you can name.
So, the only thing that you can do is understand things at the level of thinking. There is no other level of understanding, and in spite of the fact that all your attempts to understand this have generally not helped, you still keep on hoping that this instrument will be of some use in understanding things, maybe tomorrow, next time, Tuesday, Wednesday, next year, hmmm? THUS, THIS IS NOT THE INSTRUMENT FOR UNDERSTANDING ANYTHING!
That is the first thing that has to penetrate you, that thinking is not the instrument. Without even worrying about another instrument. 'This is not the instrument', that is enough. And if this is really the situation in which you find yourself, is there anything else to understand? No, there is nothing else to understand.
Your life appears to have absolutely no meaning so you go searching for a meaning, you search for a goal. As long as you are searching for a goal, and as long as you are searching for meaning you will remain wandering around restlessly. 'There must after all be something meaningful to do, something with more content, something more interesting than what I'm doing now', you tell yourself. And the only thing you can do is to change yourself, hmm? But in reality there is no possibility of changing. Do you thoroughly realize that ? The only change takes place in your thought structure, you begin to think differently and therefore to experience and feel things differently. Basically however everything remains exactly as it was. You can change your clothes and only wear the most 'fashionable' clothing just to be 'in', but inside you are still the same. Wanting to understand is only useful for changing small things in yourself. There is nothing you can do to change the past. In the hope of changing things in the future, you remain stuck with the miserable present, which is in fact the past.
The past is always active. If the past ends, you end. That is the reason why you will never allow that, no matter how hard you try. The past is everywhere in you. Every cell in your body is permeated by it. Every nerve is involved in it. The past has this body so much under control that it will not let it go. The past will not come to an end through any effort you make or whatever will power you effect! The more effort you put into it, the more willpower you use, the stronger it becomes. You came across many insights in this process, but every insight reinforces the past. It does not in any way help to understand anything and to thus free yourself from whatever. Every insight that you obtain with your investigations only strengthens and solidifies that.
Thus.. what should you try to do in such a situation? NOTHING, NOTHING AT ALL! Nothing, no power in the world can help you, period. Thus, as long as you remain dependent on any authority outside of you, you remain hopeless. Once you understand this clearly, there is no more helplessness, your helplessness no longer exists. The you actually don't know what to do. This is the situation where you have to arrive, no longer knowing what to do. And, if you expect that something will happen from what you then call your 'clarity of thinking', or your 'meditation' or something similar, then you are lost forever. Because that is not the true clarity. [ ]